My dad was a lieutenant in the Navy in the early 1960’s and was not exactly an emotive guy. He was affectionate and a great dad, but while I was growing up I could probably count on one hand the number of times we said, “I love you,” to each other. Even though I’ve always loved him, and I know he loves me, we’d still only say it to each other at maybe a funeral or a graduation.

Then I do the Landmark Forum when I’m 26. So after the course I realize that it’s actually a problem for me that I don’t tell my dad (out loud) that I love him. We talk on the phone all the time, and so I’m driving in my car and am talking on the phone with him and it’s getting to the point where I can tell the conversation is wrapping up, and so a little voice in my head is saying to me, “A.J., you’ve got to say ‘I love you’!” but I’m also really nervous.

So he says, “Okay A.J., I’ll talk to you later,” and then I say, “Alright dad, I’ll talk to you soon. I love you,” and he says, after a little pause, “I love you too, son.” It feels very…new, but I have a big smile on my face. And so every time after that, it got easier and easier to say. Now we say “I love you” to each other every time we talk on the phone. It also spread from him doing it with me to now when my dad talks to my brother and sister, they say, “I love you,” to each other on the phone every time too.